Theoretically, it is
the age of equal opportunities. Maybe more than equal, since many offices give
preference to females during the recruitment phase. But still, many women do
not feel completely comfortable in office environments, even those who have
been given every opportunity to excel. The duties of home and hearth, coupled
with some unwritten rules of discrimination, contribute to haunt women at
workplaces.
Gyanu Pandey, Professor
of Nepali Literature, once used to be a journalist. She sent word to a
prominent politician that she would come to interview him the next day. When
she reached his house, she was not given audience for a long time. She asked
his PA to tell him that she was waiting, and only then did the politician
appear. “Oh it’s you!” said he. “But my PA told me it was a woman!”
Such outright
discrimination, when the politician had assumed that a woman cannot be a
journalist, is rare today but has not been completely eradicated. Younger women
continue to be underestimated and passed over just because they are women.
Shikha Bagla, an
aspiring Chartered Accountant currently doing her articleship (three-year
internship for CAs), feels that her male colleagues are handed important
assignments more often than her. “Women can’t really handle major projects” is
something she gets a lot, but when she studies her male colleagues’ reports to
see if they have done anything better, she finds no difference in the quality.
In this era of
positive discrimination, such direct bias has reduced by much. And yet, women continue
to face insubordination from juniors like clerks and drivers, or even clients.
Umi Joshi,
administrative assistant at WWF, wonders if it is because women are so soft and
feminine. “Do we have to be commanding like men to be obeyed?” she asks
thoughtfully, bringing up a complicated question of what femininity means in
the first place. Is femininity always soft? Should women learn to be forceful
to be heard at work? A cursory analysis may say so, but the truth is far more
complicated than an easy yes or no answer.
One reason women lose
their confidence at work is when femininity is discussed in traditional
perspectives. Shikha gets uncomfortable when her male colleagues talk about actresses
and models, and not in the most polite language. They ignore the presence of
female colleagues, and the fact that sexist jokes may offend them. Sometimes,
the talk may veer to personal issues, for example, someone may say “I need to
get married because I need a dishwasher.” Reacting to such statements invites
conflicts or the label of ‘feminist,’ while not reacting makes the women feel
insulted.
Advices like “Take the
Teej fast, as every good woman should,” or “Girls shouldn’t drink” abound in
workplaces. Public space is just an extension of private space for these
commentators, effective dumping ground for private ideologies. Women surrounded
by such ideologies day in and day out end up feeling harassed for no reason,
when these issues are unrelated to work and should have no bearing on the work
environment.
Our social rules are
changing, and many have learnt to keep offending opinions to themselves at
work. But handling relationships at work remains a problem for women. For
Shikha, keeping good relations with clients is a part of her duties. A man in
her post may easily ask a client out to coffee or even drinks, but if a woman
does the same, it gives out a different message. Things may get out of hand
pretty soon and they start getting late night personal calls. When they try to
keep their distance, clients complain that this particular woman is rude. Senior
management do not understand such predicaments, and may instead turn around and
reprimand junior female officers for not keeping good relations with clients.
Women feel comfortable
if there are senior women in the management with whom they can talk about these
issues. Having senior women in the management has many other benefits. “A woman
can come in and tell me it’s that time of the month, and I will understand,”
says Raveena Desraj Shrestha, Chief Business Officer at Mega Bank.
Raveena used to be a
dresser in her younger days, paying a lot of attention to grooming. This
immediately slotted her in the ‘Barbie Doll’ category for many, and she had to
go out of her way to prove that she had brains. But now that she herself is in
a senior position, she makes sure her juniors are well groomed, and does not
tolerate any judgments based on appearances.
But that is not all. Hira
Acharya, Under Secretary at HSEB, recounts that sometimes women hesitate to ask
even work-related questions to supervisors, for fear of being laughed at. Even
more, they are afraid of hearing the predictable “No wonder you don’t know
much, women never do!” Surrounded by men, there is the pressure to prove that
you are capable. If not, you risk labeling the entire female fraternity a
failure. In more diverse environments, everyone feels comfortable to speak up
about their doubts and challenges.
Women are known to be
empathetic and intuitive and international researches tell us that women are
sincere at work. Testimonials from employees in widely read business magazines
tell us that women make good managers. And yet, women are mostly seen only in
low to mid-level management, and not at the top.
“Theoretically, the
opportunities are out there for anyone to grab,” says Umi, “And yet, there is
this invisible glass ceiling which restricts women from advancing after a
certain step.”
In the previous eras
of homo-socializing, when men were friends with men only and women with women,
women had few senior persons to socialize with. But men often socialized before
or after work with colleagues, which created a bond between them. When two people
compete for promotion, this bond may prove a crucial decisive factor, all else
considered.
Many women of that
generation bear the grudge of being left out of the promotion loop. “Why is it
that I’m one of the first two females to become a Professor in the Department
of Nepali Literature?” asks Gyanu who only got the coveted highest post in
academia a few months ago. “It’s not that there were no qualified women before
me, but somehow it was easy to pass them over.”
In these changing
times, socializing in mixed groups has become normal. And yet, women often do
not have the time to socialize because of responsibilities at home. With the
birth of children, demands on time increase dramatically for women, but only
marginally for men. No wonder when asked about what can be done to make offices
women-friendly, Raveena does not skip a beat before saying “crèches.” These
responsibilities mean that women may not have as much energy as a male
counterpart to give to work. This also means that women depart from work earlier
than male counterparts, cutting out their socializing time.
Ultimately, we come to
the question of how to change things for the better. As a gender studies
expert, Gyanu is wary of playing the gender card all the time. “The problems
women face are definitely bigger, but focusing only on women may create
imbalance in society in favor of women,” says she. The focus should be on
changing all of society, not just women.
International pressures
and scrutiny have raised our awareness of gender issues, and most offices,
especially multinationals, have already prohibited discrimination. Testimonials
from women indicate that increasing not just the quality but also quantity of
women in workplaces contributes to women-friendly environments. With more and
more women joining the workforce, perhaps the day is not far when women can
feel as comfortable at workplace as their male counterparts.
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